well, golfing badly yesterday was a blast…and i learned a couple of lessons, too. 1) trying to “be the ball” is not as effective or easy to implement as a simple “keep your eye on the ball” command. 2) it’s very disconcerting to unexpectedly dump your sordid history into a blog and make it public (see yesterday’s post if you must…or trust my assertion that i’ve hurt enough in one lifetime to offer a word or two of comfort). 3) it’s more disconcerting to realize that you can no longer pick up a sporting good and expect your body to function well when you do it as infrequently as i do. (it seemed to function alright…oh, how the pain lies in wait, conspiring with my alarm clock for a dastardly a.m. ambush.) 4) jumping from a swing into playground wood chips while wearing flip flops is sketchy at best, and a great opportunity to test your falling and rolling skills. (i still GOT ’em!)

so gimpy mcgracefulpants over here has an old person’s knee this morning, painfully tight hips and the shortest hamstrings i’ve had since my growth spurt. i guess it’s time to slow it down a little and prepare my body for all of this fun. i’m back to that balance thing…regular exercise has to fit on the beam somewhere, the kind of exercise that strengthens the core, loosens a low back and builds yet more capacity and capability in a heart so filled with gladness. (incidentally, i now have empirical evidence that gladness is not the same as oxygen.)

as with anything risky, it’s not very smart to assume that your body or mind will know what to do, or when to do it, without some warm-ups, without practice, without building up the strength you’ll need to finish with a flourish and a fan club…or if flourish and fan clubs aren’t your thing, how about simply finishing without major performance problems and pain?

i’m up early this morning, meeting some deadlines, but more importantly, putting in some practice at risky things. i’m preparing myself for life’s dangerous delights like writing my heart out and swinging things at balls (i’m still talking about sporting goods in case you’re confused). i’m sore, things hurt, and i’ve identified some weak spots…but how much fun am i having doing this? so much that it has to be worth the risk and the effort of trying, and worth the work it will take to live, Love and play as fluently as i imagine i can.

if i had a hot tub, i’d be in it. i do well in hot water and i have empirical evidence to support that…though i’d prefer the literal over the figurative this morning. so as i literally limp through this day, and a nice hot shower, i will figuratively warm my heart and these pages, and try again to beam with better balance…one day, one strain, one pain (in the ass) at a time.