here i am! head swirling, eyes tearing, coffee soothing…it’s tuesday! hmmm. this morning starts strangely, but in one happy development, i’m here tap-tap-typing away. i’d had some silly action figure idea that i’d be able to post regularly from the road…and, “hey AFT, throw your workout shoes in that travel bag while yer at it, and start you up a morning routine…you can squeeze it in between coffee and the part where you write and work a full, 10-hour teaching and technical day!” yeah. that was my internal aerobics teacher talking…you know, the one whose enthusiastic little voice i could slap right outta her mouth most days.

so i’m writing a smidge, instead of the daily beating i had scheduled in the event that i was too sleepy or too late to write anything. i was pretty convinced that i was too sleepy this morning, but my restless toddler once again altered my perceptions and plans for the day.  i found that i was fairly well wide awake after my 5:30am meltdown in response to her 5:15am meltdown. she witnessed some of my sleepy boohoo tantrum, felt bad for me, and agreed to try to get a little more sleep, since i so clearly needed it.

sneaky me, i let it buy me some coffee time and a little catch up moment, plus time to clear my blubbering, sleepy otolaryngology…and hey, i’m slipping a post in where wimpy, whiney self-flagellation was supposed to be…and trying to learn how to say otolaryngology in some way that sounds natural and less like i have a bucket of nickelodeon slime in my mouth. oh coffee my coffee. a half carafe left is my only hope today.

i’m doing the ol’ touch-n-go, driving out of here tomorrow night for another short trip. again, i humor myself thinking, “maybe…since i just taught this class…it will go magically and smoothly, efficiently and effortlessly…enough for me to carve out time for that new fitness hour and get a post in before class starts at 8am.” you know, because technical problems and environments are so predictable…just like student’s learning abilities and attitudes. snort. trainer humor. (nerd flag).

actually, in this case, the attitude part is more predictable than it would be for many of my students. now that i’ve jinxed myself, i will go on to say that i’ve been working on my favorite project, my baby…my fickle, unorganized, never sleeps through the night baby. i’m training professional candidates from the AbilityOne program, a group of non-profits for the Visually Impaired and/or Severely Disabled. like many organizations doing something new, there are still some acts of a keystone cops drama to get through at the top of the food chain before things run smoothly for us middle logistics managers. but no matter what it might have taken to get computer equipment, training materials and a qualified trainer to one site at the same time, inevitably my students walk into my training room ready and eager to learn specific technical skills and anything else i can teach them, technical skills they will add to their federal contracting training and their Bachelor’s degrees. their attitudes and gratitudes are inspiring, and they are mostly all funny as hell. it’s a regular Improv event everyday, student and teacher all yukking it up…and learning stuff too.

just writing about them this morning swells my chest a little. it gives me inspiration for my wednesday night drive outta dodge. it makes me grateful for all of the people in this world for whom kindness is their first value, with determination and humor trailing closely. kinda makes my meltdown this morning feel a little more pathetic…but i have to say it’s worth it sometimes to just let it out in one big bawl. my little fit of tears and self-pity got my daughter two more hours of sleep that i know she needed, and gave me a little time to look for my actionfigure shoes and the rest of my superhero gitch. i didn’t have room for it in my carry on this last go round. let’s see how she travels on a road trip.