Tag Archives: motivation

sleepytime town and a storm of tempurpedic proportions

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what an odd morning. i woke in a dark room from a sad and terrible nightmare. i noticed a yellow-orange daylight peeking through tree leaves and curtain edges as i shuffled to the bathroom. downstairs, i fumbled with a fearfully small number of coffee beans, pleading with the Universe for my own fish and loaves moment, and saw the strange yellow-orange glow deepening…not like sunrise, but something more surreal.

my twelve beans ground and watered, prayers for abundance prayed, i plopped down on my couch to check some headlines and read a post or two. i heard the coffee pot plodding through its typical morning motions, water hoses stretching, dumping black-enough liquid down the yawning throat of my carafe. through the french doors to the deck, i noticed the glow grow more haunting and less natural by the minute. i double-checked my sanity and a light switch, the outdoor lights are broken, they cannot be on. right? 

having lived in lots of tornado towns and a few hurricane alleys, i felt compelled to peek at yahoo weather and then at the sky. the forecast was unremarkable, but a strange september glow permeated all of the air, all the way up  to a cloud deck unsure of its own thickness. half asleep, i dismissed the eerieness and thought about falling backwards in time…just a few more weeks until we stop saving up our daylight for the harvest.

by then, black-enough liquid was wafting its siren scent and a day’s promises through the morning air. i grabbed a cup and softly smiled at the mixture, ever grateful that my fish and loaves brewed up this strong. it won’t be a lot of coffee, but it will be good coffee…and there is a starbucks on my way to work…an office i’m actually going to today in a rare show of executive dedication. as i walked back to my laptop, the day’s deadlines, my wordpress pages and a snoring couch dog, i heard the noise, unmistakable and soothing, of a morning deluge. in the next few minutes, a few booms of thunder and a thousand buckets of rain washed that yellow-orange glow right out of the sky.

i knew it. the color of a storms coming. green electric air or orange incandescent air…they both bring up my hackles gently, like hot breath at the back of my neck. it’s calm again now, everything soaked, the air a mundane morning grey. today feels soft so far, though i suspect it will grow chaotic as more brightly lit hours approach. this mood, this morning, is unexpected after the excitement and rollercoaster ride of recent weeks. i take pause to breathe. i try to muster an enthusiasm i don’t feel, while savoring a calm i don’t often experience in the middle of a work week.

it feels like a draw-the-curtains-and-sleep-all-day kind of wednesday. that feeling couldn’t be further from the reality that’s warming up my google calendar as i type. i do get this dreamy, this sedate…when the air gets heavy enough to weigh down my eyelashes, when the world outside doesn’t want to wake up any more than i do. and here i am looking for humor and wit and brilliance to share while all i have is this soft mid-week sigh.

yawn. dream. drink. dress. do. i’ll find something to laugh about. i’ll find enough coffee and company to turn myself into the spazz we all know and sometimes love. for now, i’ll let the silence in my heart and head wrap this day in a blanket of humidity, humility and humanity.

(and as i proof this, the first sound of a real wednesday pokes  my quiet morning mind…my cat is hurling. on hardwood. oh yeah. and the coffee pot is empty already. God help me. starbucks delivery anyone?)

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mangled monday missives – stop and smell the dog farts

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wow, one weekend-long headache and trish is a bit grumpy and distracted on an mangled monday morning. i will go with the commenter (and dear friend) who blames all of this pain on my obvious and glorious summer awakening (unrelated to my individual disgruntled morning awakenings, or dreary middle of the night toddler-soothing awakenings of late). my headache and flagging attitude, along with a busy monday schedule, mean that these paragraphs will be short today.

i’m trying and mostly succeeding at keeping my momentum and optimism in play every day, despite several anchors and irritants that i’m suddenly dragging through the sand and my eyes. i’ve got a 105lb dog with the runs…and subsequently, a house that smells largely of dog farts, nuanced by the pungent cat food scent wafting around the main floor. tomorrow is garbage day…it’s a veritable cacophony of subtle monday morning stenches. i’m sure my toddler’s room will be refreshing after her unsettled night in diapers. thank goodness for the strong smell of coffee and febreze noticeables.

i started this blog weeks ago with a “hey, i wrote something” entry, and today i will keep it going with largely the same sentiment. a baby crying, a neck hurting, a dog farting and a monday sun hanging high already…this day is asking a lot of my patience and Love and dwindling coffee bean supply. i’m here this morning at my computer like a gym hamster on a LifeFitness wheel of words…workin’ muscles just to say i did. it’s hard to feel the value of that kind of practice in the moment…the begrudged breaths, cynical muscles, stretched linguistics, rolling eye strains…but somehow just having pushed your way through it…through the base running drills and cardio climbs…by drinking down the metaphor milk and pushing through more word crunches…it all helps…it all checks a box, feeds another dream, inspires another wish and turns “one days” into “todays,” much to my own surprise sometimes. it’s how we humans operate, even though we can’t always see the process in play. i’m falling for the romance of the word my father tried so hard to sell…discipline.

so as i ramble through some sentences, and trudge through some morning prep and an office drive, i will sip at my coffee beans, find my gratitude and a bottle of aleve, and pat myself on the back for a run or two around the wonder wheel. i’ll start the day and my interactions as gently as a i can…push the aerobics instructor voices out of my head and out of my way, cheer and sneer at the morning joggers on my commute, and shake hands with this week that promises much…as much as i make of it.

peace, kids. and you too roscoe…that last airy audible, i’m sure, is wafting my way with olfactory gifts…and that’s my cue…